Parents of newborn babies: Be mindful of what you do and say, because you’re being watched.
A new study from Reichman University in Herzliya has revealed that as early as the first year of life, infants develop expectations about how their parents will respond to crying or distress.
Although young infants regularly seek their parents’ proximity and care, parental responsiveness is especially needed when infants feel insecure, frightened, in pain, or otherwise distressed. A baby who consistently receives comforting responses learns to expect help and develops a sense of security, whereas one who experiences inconsistent responses learns to be less reliant on others and develops a sense of insecurity. Babies thus learn to understand the world in which they live even before they are able to talk.
Infants’ mental representations of attachment are thought to develop across the first year, but due to methodological challenges, empirical attempts to assess this have been scarce.
But the new study shows that an infant’s daily experiences with their parent shape how they perceive the world around them – whether as a safe and supportive place or as distant and unpredictable.
The research was led by Dr. Tahli Frenkel, a clinical psychologist and senior lecturer at Reichman’s Baruch Ivcher School of Psychology, and Dr. Shyly Aptaker Ben-Dori of the university’s Ziama Arkin Infancy Institute, in collaboration with Prof. Naama Atzaba-Poria at Ben-Gurion University of the Negev (BGU).
Published in the scientific journal Attachment & Human Development under the title “Individual differences in infants’ expectations and preferences for responsive vs. unresponsive parent-puppets and their associations with early maternal behavior,” it followed 72 mothers and their infants.
Keeping close eye on the infants
THE BABIES were watched by the researchers twice during their first year of life. When they were just four months old, natural home interactions were recorded to examine how mothers responded to their infants’ cries – whether by being present and soothing or by remaining distant.
Six months later, at 10 months of age, they were shown a short puppet show depicting a caregiver teddy bear character responding to an infant’s (“baby bear”) cry – once in a supportive manner and once in a cold and unresponsive way. The researchers monitored the infants’ reactions, including gaze duration, level of interest and play preferences, to find out whether they recognized the difference in the caregiver’s response and how it corresponded with their previous experiences at home.
Two experimenters conducted the procedure. One performed the puppet show, while the second monitored the infant via a control room monitor and measured looking times. The second experimenter could not see the puppet show. Three cameras recorded the procedure – the infant, the puppet show, and the entire setup. Recordings were used for quality control and verifying measurement reliability. Immediately after watching the puppet show, infants were presented with the two parent-bear puppets and encouraged to choose one.
When infants’ responses in the lab were compared with interactions recorded at home six-months earlier, a clear pattern emerged. Infants whose mothers had been observed responding calmly with emotional availability at home, tended to expect the caregiver-bear in the experiment to behave similarly – to be responsive and supportive. However, infants who had experienced less-consistent, more-distant responses at home showed lower expectations and, in some cases, indifference toward the unresponsive caregiver bear-figure.
Babies naturally stare longer at things that surprise them. Infants who experienced responsive caregiving looked longer at the “unresponsive parent” scenes, suggesting these violated their expectations.
Moreover, when the infants were offered to choose whether they preferred to play with either the responsive or the unresponsive caregiver-bear, prior experience of caregiving observed in the infant’s home six-months earlier predicted the baby’s preference. Those whose mothers had been observed responding in a responsive manner preferred to play with the responsive caregiver-bear, while those whose mothers had been observed as more distant preferred to play with the unresponsive caregiver-bear.
FRENKEL, WHO was born in Chicago to Israeli parents who returned when she was 12, told The Jerusalem Post that “the infant brain is incredibly malleable, constantly shaped by experience. This is a positive thing – simple, daily interactions, whether with mother, father, or any caregiver who spends considerable time with the infant, offer important learning opportunities.
“Through these interactions, the baby learns lessons about relationships, itself, and the world: Is it a safe world? Will I get help? When I cry, can I influence my environment? Am I worthy of getting a response?”
It’s important to educate parents and daycare providers and establish policies that support caregiver responsiveness, including proper baby-to-caregiver ratios in daycare centers, she said.
Frenkel emphasized that caregivers aren’t expected to respond instantly to every cry – that’s neither possible nor optimal. “Infants actually learn from manageable everyday stress. It takes moments to bring a bottle or reach the crib at night. The infant experiences tolerable stress and the caregiver helps soothe. Through cycles of distress and external regulation, infants develop their own capacity for self-regulation.
“But it’s crucial to understand that babies need caregiver’s help; they cannot self-regulate alone,” the Reichman psychologist explained.
“When left to cry unattended, stress levels become toxic. This doesn’t build resilience; it weakens it,” she said. “The baby may stop crying, but if we checked their cortisol level, it would be extremely high, the baby stopped crying because they gave up.”
Frenkel added that “we don’t remember our infancy, so we assume babies don’t register early experiences. But they do; early experiences are registered in the body. In extreme situations like abuse in daycare or war-related stress as experienced in Israel, infants need help processing. They’re more vulnerable than adults and need an adult to help process these experiences. A qualified expert can give parents tools to help their baby – and the sooner the better. Malleability of the infant brain makes early interventions extremely effective.”
THE RESEARCHERS said their findings provided preliminary evidence that by the end of their first year, infants have created an internal representation of what to expect when they express distress, based on their daily experiences with their caregivers.
“Nevertheless, it’s important to emphasize that early expectation patterns are not fixed. They’re relatively stable but definitely changeable. Even if a parent struggled, for whatever reason, to be available and responsive to the infant’s needs, new nurturing experiences can gradually re-establish an infant’s sense of trust. It’s never too late. I encourage parents to seek help in these situations – early interventions are extremely effective,” she said.
Frenkel concluded that the results carry an encouraging message for parents: “The first year of life is a particularly significant period during which daily interactions lay the foundations for a child’s emotional resilience. Consistent, attentive, and supportive responses shape the baby’s sense of security and fundamental trust in the world.”